So once again it's been a while since I've kept this up to date. It's mostly because I don't have much to say. In the states my life consists of work and sleep and watching T.V., it's pretty boring.
However, it's getting down to the wire now. If my plan goes the way I'd like it to I'll be moving in may, which means I have a little under 2 months to get all my shit together and do this.
It's scary. I'm terrified. Part of me wants to just not move (again) because it's easier to give up and stay here than it is to take a wild leap. Now that Jose and I are broken up (again) it makes it a little more intimidating to move because I'll be living in an apartment by my self. This is not something new for me. I've been living on my own for the better part of 10 years so it's not like I'm not used to being alone all the time. However, I've never been living alone in a foreign country. What doesn't help is that I have this little problem with my brain that makes things worse. I don't know if I've shared this with you, blog readers, but I was diagnosed with manic depression when I was like 14. It makes things a lot harder to deal with.
Right now I have the paranoia that my "friends" in Mexico will suddenly give up on me for whatever reason (which is something that happens more often than I'd like) and I'll really be alone.
I'm also nervous about what to bring and all of that. Packing for vacation is easy, packing for a move is also easy, packing for an extended move vacation is hard. I have friends looking for apartments for me right now but I wish I could be doing it myself, sadly all the properties that I've found online are more expensive than I'd like to be paying.
Today is one of the 2 days off I'm going to have before my 6 day work weeks start so I'm going to try and get a bunch done.
This blog entry sucks. I am very sorry for that.
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